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  Definitions For Parents  

       AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labour to make love again.
      DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
      FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.
      FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when your baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
      FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him/her
      GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
      HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
      IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labour is still vivid.
      INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
      OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.
      PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
      SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours.
      STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
      TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.
      TWO MINUTE WARNING: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
      VERBAL: Able to whine in words.
      WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house...

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