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  Marriage Woes  

      "Take a bunch of flowers home for your wife, sir," urged the street vendor.
      "I haven't got a wife," replied the young man.
      "Then buy a bunch for your sweetheart."
      "I don't have a sweetheart, either."
      "Well then, buy a couple of bunches to celebrate your luck."

      "Congratulations my boy!" said the groom's uncle. "I'm sure you'll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life."
      "But I'm not getting married until tomorrow." Protested his nephew.
      "I know," replied the uncle. "That's exactly what I mean."

      In her own eyes, Suzy was the most popular girl around. "A lot of men are gonna be totally miserable when I marry."
      "Really?" said her date, "And just how many men are you intending to marry?"

      "You and your husband don't seem to have an awful lot in common." said the new tenant's neighbour. "Why on earth did you get married?"
      "I suppose it was the old business of 'opposites attract'" was the reply. "He wasn't pregnant and I was."

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