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  Drunk and Bleeding  

Arriving home drunk one night, a husband cut himself when he walked into an overhanging shelf in the garage. With the blood trickling from facial wounds, he went straight upstairs to the bathroom to carry out repairs.
      The next morning, his wife said: "You came home drunk last night, didn't you?"
      "No," he replied, mustering all the sincerity at his disposal.
      "Then perhaps you can explain to me why there are plasters all over the bathroom mirror..."

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